Poetry by Bill Freedman

December 27th, 2009

 

 

 

 

Something You Can Count On

I had, once, a Captain Midnight ring
that told the weather, or so they said.
Frankly, I don’t remember Captain Midnight,
didn’t listen to him much.
Don’t know what made him special,
what made him Captain Midnight, for that matter.
But I didn’t need to, knew in my 1947 heart of hearts
he couldn’t hold a fist or pistol to Sergeant Preston,
the great Tom Mix or, most enduring of them all,
Jack Armstrong and his faithful sidekick Billy,
by no unmeaningful coincidence my namesake.

Problem was, whenever Billy spoke, tried to warn
the older man of masked enemies behind a door,
a flash flood or a gaping pit they were headed toward,
Jack hushed him. “Quiet, Billy,” he would warn,
in mild but unmistakable reproach,
“there’s no time for that now.”
And somehow, despite the villains, the torrent and abyss,
indifferent to the warnings, he prevailed.
I knew what Billy knew, spent all those years
in chastened silence to the terrors just ahead:
another neighborhood or town, a class of strangers,
repetition of my father’s life, stammering salesman
who sold us all to his timidity and fear
of everyone not us.
So though I lived and died with Jack,
I bought from Captain Midnight, who I knew,
knowing nothing else about him, would let me speak.

All it took was fifty cents, saved two months
from my allowance, and six vacuum sealant tops
from jars of Ovaltine, whose taste I loathed
but suffered for the prize of prophecy,
the knowledge, as I sat indoors, watching
hapless weathermen on CBS or NBC
grope and fumble for what a glance
at my chameleon ring would tell me.

The seal, in small but bold black print,
repeated “Ovaltine” so prolifically you knew they felt,
despite that burnt unsweetened taste,
no shame in who they were. Wisdom here,
slicing carefully around the rim to preserve each name,
rare and precious as the ring.
Pink in balmy weather, blue in bad,
and you could watch it change before your
startled eyes, the smooth voice said,
as low clouds darkened,
winds blew papers onto drivers’ glass,
and the bluely-promised rains rained fiercely down.

Scarcely three weeks later than the promised time,
the ring arrived. Proof, if it were needed,
there was a god, perhaps because you
never tuned him in, you could believe.
Split for adjustability,
as my parents, learning slowly, would,
the ring fit every finger, overlapped
behind my own like hands at prayer.
Its tightness clasped and comforted:
one anchoring possession I would not lose.
The ring was pink when it arrived and pink,
through every snow storm, frost and hurricane,
it stayed. I loved that ring.

 

 Ghosts

I was watching films,
most of whose stars and dimmer lights
had become mere ghosts, images
no realer than the beam of dusty light
between the wheezing projector and the screen.

They were familiar: Grayson and Lawford,
Kelly, O’Connor and Sinatra,
who seemed invincible back then,
and Stanley Donen,
who had come to this festival
of receding simplicity and joy
was on stage crying.
He was watching Kelly, splashing
in the artificial rain, and he was crying.

It seemed simple, ordinary,
one more abandoned mourner
weeping for the dead.
But they were my childhood,
youth and middle age, and someone
had forgotten to bury them.

Someone hoarding anger
had not released them to the skies.
Someone unbending or neglectful
had laid no stone on loosely shoveled graves,
and they were floating free,
dancing where we could not look away.

They were knotted strings on fingers
we could not untie, phoned messages
left at nine, eighteen, and thirty four
we could not erase.
Even now, lifting the receiver,
they are there.

I watched, weeks later,
the Academy Awards, where Donen,
honored for a lifetime of achievement
in this world of ghosts,
did a slow soft shoe at eighty,
pressed the statue to his cheek
and sang, “Heaven, I’m in heaven,
and my heart beats so
that I can hardly speak.”
Me too, almost, me either.

The sky’s half light, half dark,
and I am its baby, its vacationer,
all subscriptions canceled, all lines cut,
hands behind my head and drifting.
The wind blows in one direction only.
Sisyphus with resined palms and fingers,
it does not let go.

Looking up,
one imagines eyes shut softly,
a smile of earned achievement looking back.
But the lights are dimming here,
the credits pass, and I have found my seat
in the weatherless season of the ghosts.

I can see them, scattered
between the dipper and the bear:
Grant and Hepburn, Rogers and Astaire,
Hayworth, Gable and Monroe,
beautiful and flawless in their bloom.

Surely this is heaven, what is meant
by resurrection, the purified persistence
of the salvaged soul, what awaits the faithful
when the trumpet sounds, the golden ladder drops,
and we are called.

Surely God is merciful,
his great white screen alive with spirits
whittled to a small perfection in the dark.
Even the watchers may be watched,
by you just now,
their lines conjured from within like these,
or stolen from the throats of other ghosts
they long and are terrified to be.

In the dark, alone, we are all
at the mercy of the wheezing,
dusty band of light, and not just there.
On the beach next summer
look above the sea.
Is it not your father, pocked skin
airbrushed to a youthful glow,
holding your hand the only time you can recall,
crossing the sand to where the waves
fold like memories upon themselves and fall?

His sea-gray eyes: are they not fixed
on Laughton on the Bounty at full sail,
or Fairbanks swinging bravely from the mast
as sea wind blows as sea wind never blows
through hair like midnight on the risen waves,
those magnificent teeth, those watery gray eyes,
still shining.

 

 

Cufflinks

What I really loved
about fifties rock ‘n’ roll
were the cufflinks.

How the four black
backup singers
in lustrous pearl gray suits
and fuchsia ties

would angle side to side,
chanting doo wapa doo
wapa doo
while the lead voice wailed,

then extend one arm
till stiff cuffs slid
like furtive ivory
from their sheaths,

and with practiced thumb and finger
gently tug and squeeze
those lucent silver tears
till ours welled up

and we were sure
that strapless cream-skinned blond
a few aisles down
was staring straight ahead because,

like memory,
she’d fall too hopelessly in love
if she looked back.

 

About Bill Freedman

Bill Freedman has published poetry in APR, The Antioch Review, The Iowa Review, Shenandoah, The Quarterly, The International Quarterly, Dalhousie Review, The Nation and elsewhere. A book of his poems, Being Them All, was published by Ginninderra Press in 2005. Another collection, Some Can, was published, also by Ginninderra, in 2009.

 

Share this:

2 comments on “Poetry by Bill Freedman”

  1. This is incredible work! I absolutely love it! The guy is clearly a first-rate poet, and I’m
    amazed I haven’t heard his name or read his work before. I’ve never been so moved by poetry as I was by these three poems, and I’ve been reading and writing it for half a century.
    Sincerely,
    Bill Freedman

Comment on this article:

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Site Archive

Your Support is Appreciated

Jerry Jazz Musician has been commercial-free since its inception in 1999. Your generous donation helps it remain that way. Thanks very much for your kind consideration.

Click here to read about plans for the future of Jerry Jazz Musician.

Publisher’s Notes

Creatives – “This is our time!“…A Letter from the Publisher...A call to action to take on political turmoil through the use of our creativity as a way to help our fellow citizens “pierce the mundane to find the marvelous.”

In This Issue

Monk, as seen by Gottlieb, Dorsett and 16 poets – an ekphrastic poetry collection...Poets write about Thelonious Monk – inspired by William Gottlieb’s photograph and Rhonda R. Dorsett’s artistic impression of it.

Poetry

photo of Miles Davys by User:JPRoche, CC BY-SA 4.0 , via Wikimedia Commons/adapted by Rhonda R. Dorsett
“Thinking of Mr. Davis on the Fourth of July” – a poem by Juan Mobili

Poetry

21 jazz poems on the 21st of June, 2025...An ongoing series designed to share the quality of jazz poetry continuously submitted to Jerry Jazz Musician by poets sharing their relationship to the music, and with the musicians who perform it.

The Sunday Poem

”4tet at Fiesta” by Catherine Lee

The Sunday Poem is published weekly, and strives to include the poet reading their work.... Catherine Lee reads her poem at its conclusion


Click here to read previous editions of The Sunday Poem

Essay

“J.A. Rogers’ ‘Jazz at Home’: A Centennial Reflection on Jazz Representation Through the Lens of Stormy Weather and Everyday Life – an essay by Jasmine M. Taylor...The writer opines that jazz continues to survive – 100 years after J.A. Rogers’ own essay that highlighted the artistic freedom of jazz – and has “become a fundamental core in American culture and modern Americanism; not solely because of its artistic craftsmanship, but because of the spirit that jazz music embodies.”

Community

The passing of a poet: Alan Yount...Alan Yount, the Missouri native whose poems were published frequently on Jerry Jazz Musician, has passed away at the age of 77.

Interview

photo Louis Armstrong House Museum
Interview with Ricky Riccardi, author of Stomp Off, Let’s Go: The Early Years of Louis Armstrong...The author discusses the third volume of his trilogy, which includes the formation of the Armstrong-led ensembles known as the Hot Five and Hot Seven that modernized music, the way artists play it, and how audiences interact with it and respond to it.

Essay

“Is Jazz God?” – an essay by Allison Songbird...A personal journey leads to the discovery of the importance of jazz music, and finding love for it later in life.

Poetry

What is This Path – a collection of poems by Michael L. Newell...A contributor of significance to Jerry Jazz Musician, the poet Michael L. Newell shares poems he has written since being diagnosed with a concerning illness.

Publisher’s Notes

Where I’ve Been…and a brief three-dot-update...News about an important life experience, and an update about what's going on at Jerry Jazz Musician

Feature

Jimmy Baikovicius from Montevideo, Uruguay, CC BY-SA 2.0, via Wikimedia Commons
Trading Fours, with Douglas Cole, No. 25: “How I Hear Music: ‘Feel the Sway,’ A Song in Three Movements”...In this edition, due to a current and ongoing obsession with drummer Matt Wilson’s 2006 album The Scenic Route, Douglas Cole writes another poem in response to his experience listening to the track “Feel the Sway.”

Feature

Jazz History Quiz #181...Before recording his most notable work (to that point) as a saxophonist in Miles Davis’ “Birth of the Cool” nonet, his initial reputation was as an arranger, including a stint in 1946 as the staff arranger in Gene Krupa’s Orchestra. He would eventually become one of the leading voices on his instrument for almost 50 years. Who is he?

Short Fiction

Short Fiction Contest-winning story #68 — “Saharan Blues on the Seine,” by Aishatu Ado...Aminata, a displaced Malian living in Paris, is haunted by vivid memories of her homeland. Through a supernatural encounter with her grandmother, she realizes that preserving her musical heritage through performance is an act of resistance that can transform her grief into art rather than running from it.

Feature

Excerpts from David Rife’s Jazz Fiction: Take Two – Vol. 14 - "World War II and jazz"...A substantial number of novels and stories with jazz music as a component of the story have been published over the years, and the scholar David J. Rife has written short essay/reviews of them. In this 14th edition featuring excerpts from his outstanding literary resource, Rife writes about stories whose theme is World War II and jazz

Poetry

“Summer Wind” – a poem (for July) by Jerrice J. Baptiste...Jerrice's 12-month 2025 calendar of jazz poetry winds through the year with her poetic grace while inviting us to wander through music by the likes of Charlie Parker, Antonio Carlos Jobim, Hoagy Carmichael, Sarah Vaughan, Melody Gardot and Nina Simone. She welcomes July with a poem that conjurs up the great Frank Sinatra tune…

Feature

“What one song best represents your expectations for 2025?” Readers respond...When asked to name the song that best represents their expectations for 2025, respondents often cited songs of protest and of the civil rights era, but so were songs of optimism and appreciation, including Bob Thiele and George David Weiss’ composition “What a Wonderful World,” made famous by Louis Armstrong, who first performed it live in 1959. The result is a fascinating and extensive outlook on the upcoming year.

Playlist

“Eight is Great!” – a playlist by Bob Hecht...The cover of the 1959 album The Greatest Trumpet of Them All by the Dizzy Gillespie Octet. A song from the album, “Just by Myself,” is featured on Bob Hecht’s new 28-song playlist – this one devoted to octets.

Short Fiction

“Steven and Mira: Paris May 1968” – a short story by Steven P. Unger...The story – a finalist in the recently concluded 68th Short Fiction Contest – is a semiautobiographical tale of a café-hopping tour of Paris in the revolutionary summer of 1968, and a romance cut short by the overwhelming realities of national strikes, police violence at home and abroad, and finally the assassination of Bobby Kennedy.

Interview

photo by Brian McMillen
Interview with Phillip Freeman, author of In the Brewing Luminous: The Life and Music of Cecil Taylor...The author discusses Cecil Taylor – the most eminent free jazz musician of his era, whose music marked the farthest boundary of avant-garde jazz.

Short Fiction

“Every Night at Ten,” a short story by Dennis A. Blackledge...Smothering parents, heavy-handed school officials, and a dead President conspire to keep a close-knit group of smalltown junior high kids from breaking loose. But the discovery of a song on late-night radio — one supposedly loaded with dirty words — changes everything.

Short Fiction

art by Marsha Hammel
“Stuck in the Groove” – a short story by David Rudd...The story – a short-listed entry in the recently concluded 68th Short Fiction Contest – is about a saxophonist who moves away from playing bebop to experimenting with free jazz, discovering its liberating potential and possible pitfalls along the way…

Art

photo by Giovanni Piesco
The Photographs of Giovanni Piesco: Art Farmer and Benny Golson...Beginning in 1990, the noted photographer Giovanni Piesco began taking backstage photographs of many of the great musicians who played in Amsterdam’s Bimhuis, that city’s main jazz venue which is considered one of the finest in the world. Jerry Jazz Musician will occasionally publish portraits of jazz musicians that Giovanni has taken over the years. This edition features the May 10, 1996 photos of the tenor saxophonist, composer and arranger Benny Golson, and the February 13, 1997 photos of trumpet and flugelhorn player Art Farmer.

Interview

“The Fire Each Time” – an interview with New York Times best-selling author Frederick Joseph, by John Kendall Hawkins...A conversation with the two-time New York Times bestselling author of The Black Friend and Patriarchy Blues, who in 2023 was honored with the Malcolm X and Dr. Betty Shabazz Vanguard Award,. He has also been a member of The Root list of “100 Most Influential African Americans.”

Interview

Interview with Jonathon Grasse: author of Jazz Revolutionary: The Life and Music of Eric Dolphy....The multi-instrumentalist Eric Dolphy was a pioneer of avant-garde technique. His life cut short in 1964 at the age of 36, his brilliant career touched fellow musical artists, critics, and fans through his innovative work as a composer, sideman and bandleader. Jonathon Grasse’s Jazz Revolutionary is a significant exploration of Dolphy’s historic recorded works, and reminds readers of the complexity of his biography along the way. Grasse discusses his book in a December, 2024 interview.

Feature

Dmitry Rozhkov, CC BY-SA 4.0 via Wikimedia Commons
“Thoughts on Matthew Shipp’s Improvisational Style” – an essay by Jim Feast..Short of all the musicians being mind readers, what accounts for free jazz musicians’ – in this instance those playing with the pianist Matthew Shipp – incredible ability for mutual attunement as they play?

Community

Stewart Butterfield, CC BY 2.0, via Wikimedia Commons
Community Bookshelf #4...“Community Bookshelf” is a twice-yearly space where writers who have been published on Jerry Jazz Musician can share news about their recently authored books and/or recordings. This edition includes information about books published within the last six months or so (September, 2024 – March, 2025)

Interview

Interview with James Kaplan, author of 3 Shades of Blue: Miles Davis, John Coltrane, Bill Evans and the Lost Empire of Cool...The esteemed writer tells a vibrant story about the jazz world before, during, and after the 1959 recording of Kind of Blue, and how the album’s three genius musicians came together, played together, and grew together (and often apart) throughout the experience.

Community

Nominations for the Pushcart Prize XLIX...Announcing the six writers nominated for the Pushcart Prize v. XLIX, whose work was published in Jerry Jazz Musician during 2024.

Contributing Writers

Click the image to view the writers, poets and artists whose work has been published on Jerry Jazz Musician, and find links to their work

Coming Soon

An interview with Sascha Feinstein, author of Writing Jazz: Conversations with Critics and Biographers.... An interview with Tad Richards, author of Listening to Prestige:  Chronicling Its Classic Jazz Recordings, 1949 - 1972...  Also, a new Jazz History Quiz, and lots of short fiction; poetry; photography; interviews; playlists; and much more in the works...

Interview Archive

Ella Fitzgerald/IISG, CC BY-SA 2.0 , via Wikimedia Commons
Click to view the complete 25-year archive of Jerry Jazz Musician interviews, including those recently published with Judith Tick on Ella Fitzgerald (pictured),; Laura Flam and Emily Sieu Liebowitz on the Girl Groups of the 60's; Tad Richards on Small Group Swing; Stephanie Stein Crease on Chick Webb; Brent Hayes Edwards on Henry Threadgill; Richard Koloda on Albert Ayler; Glenn Mott on Stanley Crouch; Richard Carlin and Ken Bloom on Eubie Blake; Richard Brent Turner on jazz and Islam; Alyn Shipton on the art of jazz; Shawn Levy on the original queens of standup comedy; Travis Atria on the expatriate trumpeter Arthur Briggs; Kitt Shapiro on her life with her mother, Eartha Kitt; Will Friedwald on Nat King Cole; Wayne Enstice on the drummer Dottie Dodgion; the drummer Joe La Barbera on Bill Evans; Philip Clark on Dave Brubeck; Nicholas Buccola on James Baldwin and William F. Buckley; Ricky Riccardi on Louis Armstrong; Dan Morgenstern and Christian Sands on Erroll Garner; Maria Golia on Ornette Coleman.